Not Today Jesus

Satan's got plans! Our "Not Today Jesus" T-Shirts and Hoodies feature a bold pentagram design with Baphomet goat head, delivering irreverent humor with heavy metal aesthetics. This premium apparel combines dark comedy with occult imagery—perfect for those who appreciate edgy humor and aren't afraid to push boundaries.

Each item features a high-quality DTF (Direct to Film) print with detailed pentagram and Baphomet illustration in metallic gold linework, bold red varsity-style lettering, and intricate occult symbolism, ensuring striking contrast, sharp detail, and resistance to cracking or fading—even after multiple washes. Because dark humor deserves devilishly good quality.

Made from super-soft, breathable cotton (t-shirts) and cozy, fleece-lined blends (hoodies), these pieces deliver all-day comfort whether you're embracing your dark side, attending metal concerts, or just declining salvation with style. Perfect for metalheads, dark humor fans, satanic aesthetic lovers, and anyone who knows that sometimes you just need a day off from righteousness.

Not today, Jesus. Satan's calling. Dark humor approved.